God's Plans...

Over the past days I have been giving much thought to God's Will, Purpose and Plan for my life.
This is not a new topic, it is something I have often thought about and struggled with ever since my days in University.

Every child has dreams and plans of what that want to be when they grow up... usually as children the answers include a teacher, nurse, fire fighter, policeman/woman, lawyer, doctor and the list goes on... As a child I had two dream jobs one was to be a Lawyer and the other was to own my own NHL team :D. Unfortunately neither of those came to be!!

As I have been dealing with my panic attacks over the past months I once again have been giving a lot of thought to my career goals, dreams, and future... With those thoughts come many questions such as; Am I doing what the Lord wants me to do with my life? Is my chosen field of work what God sees for me? Am I fulfilled in Ministry? Am I truly content or am I so content that I have stopped listening to God's leading?? These are questions which only the Lord and I can answer.

As I was doing my daily Devotions I came across this interesting question:
Are you holding on tightly to some best-laid plans that God is nudging you to let go of? Trust him, lean back and enjoy the ride.

That's the question I am asking myself tonite and maybe its a question you need to ask yourself as well? I don't know the answer to that only you and God can know the answer. I pray that you too will be open to His leading in your life.

That I Might Live....

I am one of those people who finds inspiration at what may seem to be the strangest times! Today is a great example of this... I was watching a lunch time TV program that mom and I enjoy and in the show a man had died while rescuing a teenage boy who had fallen through the ice. The 'haha lightbulb moment' for me was when the mom was explaning to her son that the man had died and she said 'He died so that you could have life. He was willing to risk his live to save yours.' Immediately in my mind I thought you know that is what Jesus did for me. He died so that I could have LIFE. He didnt freeze to death in a lake. He died on a cruel rugged cross for my sins so that I could have LIFE - Eternal Life. When he bowed His head and died on that Good Friday He died so that I could live... not live in the physical body but live spiritually. Today I am so thankful that Jesus was willing to die for me... that he was willing to lay down his life so that my sins could be forgiven. He died so that one day I can live with Him forever in heaven! Now that's what I call being rescued!!

Heart Check

Tonight I had the opportunity via the internet to watch the morning service from Springdale Corps. As I listened to Major Doreen's message about having a Heart Check, I found myself examining my own heart. Of course the heart she was talking about was the 'spiritual' heart. One of the verses she made reference to which really caught my attention was 2 Cor. 10:5 'Take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.' As I reflected on this verse I thought to myself 'how many of my thoughts are Christ-like? How many of my thoughts are truly 'under the spirit's control'? It is SO EASY when in a case like mine faced with panic attacks and days filled with often more questions than answers to feel overwhelmed, to feel a sense of 'no one understands', a sense of how much more can I take??

As I reflected on all this I realized some important truths...
No matter the panic attacks, no matter how rough the day may be I am NEVER ALONE. The Lord is with me.
Some things in this life I can not control. I can not control how others treat me... and sometimes their treatment will be cruel and harsh and cause me a lot of pain. But I will not be overcome by this... I will not be overcome by evil but will overcome evil with good.

I can not change these nasty people that treat me wrong but I can choose to rise above this by placing my every thought and feeling before the Lord and allowing Him to heal me. Allow Him to restore me and to be able to face each day not in my strength but in His strength.
Tonight the Joy of the Lord is my strength. He is my rock, my fortress... He is my salvation!

Tonite I have examined my heart... I pray that during this month of February that is often known as 'Heart Month' that you will examine your heart as well.
Take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

One of my favorite choruses says:

Jesus I long to be like you
loving in every way
Jesus I need to be like you
Please hear me as I pray.
You are my pattern for living
Your way of life is my goal
Patient and kind and forgiving
Under the Spirit's control
Transform my life from within Lord
Come and my heart refine
You are my pattern for living
Give me a heart like thine.